haze

has the haze left your eyes
the cover is clearing soon
put forward your desires
that linger in the dark
spark the coming change
withstanding harsh secrets
emerging from depths below
if you can guide them safely
they’ll beckon to your voice
command precise control
slowly til the facade falls
broken in two, matching pieces
we can reminisce their demise
after we collect our prize
once the haze has left your eyes

abdicate

it started in my ears
the faint tune
rang true to me
it began to shift me
strip away the years
of anger
of love
of knowledge
of fear
back to my essence
of my innocence
i became ambitious
i longed for life
i felt free of all ties
i relished in it
and when it stopped
the layers of years
returned slowly
the escape i felt
had come to an end

i search for the tune
when i wish to relive
those years ago
that passed so soon

severed

i’ve had trouble recollecting memories
moreso being able to separate the fact
from the fiction i’ve entwined
to the stories i share

did i kiss you softly
while the sun began to set
or did you leave me coldly
on a november night

did i tell you my feelings
attaching myself to your soul
or did i retract my lust
pushing you outward

was i kind to you
a shoulder to cry on
or did i brush you off
to stay home alone

did we enjoy your fathers wine
in the early mornings of our youth
or did i ignore your call
to look at ones and zeros till two

did i stand up for you
take the hits you couldn’t
or did i run out
showing my true cowardice

maybe the truth lies therein
lost among the fiction
with actions that should have been
but will only ever be

in stories

marred

i lost my strength
when i lost my ambition
pulling myself forward
on leftover guilt
to get to a nominal goal

can you raise me
wherever it is i land
to my former self
whoever they were
before all this

change can happen
in and around us
but we always revert
blood burns anew
back to bones

have my teeth sharpened
gnawing on prosperity
mascarading as happiness
breaking down
to heal me

give me more time
to collect the tides
that bring in hope
encrypted in faces
waiting for answers

until i succeed
to resolve uncertainty
to rectify old mistakes
to conquer current fears
i continue forward