eventide

have you been looking past
yesterdays tired reflection
though you seem to progress fast
it’s in the wrong direction

wait until the sun rises high
casts a shadow of an old friend
as times passes on by
you can finally reach the end

have you learned from your mistakes
taking on more risks and fear
sorting through the lies and fakes
until everything becomes clear

is there more to you then this
unimaginative ideals thrown in
an never ending untangable abyss
composed of agonising sin

sister

the answer you gave me
was filled with sad acceptance
matching the morbidity
of my unannounced question

do we choose to accept it
have we come to terms
that those we were close too
have and will be further away

our once close relation
has been shifted
to second thoughts
and derelict memories

those we trusted
with guarded secrets
spent long days and nights
rebelling in our youth with

have come to an end
the seemingly eternal flame
smothered by reaching proximity
by the unravelling myriad of time

the guilt we feel
wondering if our lack of effort
is the direct result
that makes us so ill

have we let them down
are they no longer worthy
do we deserve their forgivness
or did we make the right move

was our growth too much
outweighing the bond
that kept us down
never to progress

did the ambition
we tasted and soon devoured
become the downfall of us
our signed fate declared

my breath filled
with drink that night
you looked down
and then at me

“friends are still friends. even when proximities are increased. when character is discovered. bonds can be mended. when the time for growth is completed. and fires, fires can always be reignited.”

i was a fool to question
something i should’ve know
the answer to
thank you, sister

false front

are you tepid to the truth
or just slightly aroused
by the notion of deceit
to lead you ahead
with unbridled gratitude

does your skin itch
when the temperature rises
exposing character flaws
that dampen perceptions
to undervalue you

has your hand started trembling
as the stories are unravelling
with lights shining over you
now their screaming for blood
sad to say you’ve been bone dry

for years

monarch

if i called you now
i’d ask how you are
if your hair is still blonde

i’d recall summers
in small towns with friends
walking from one point to another

does your aunt still live
in a basement apartment
with broken windows

why did you never talk
about your mom or dad
where they were or weren’t

why you were interested
in me being around
as your world shook

the friends you kept
or left behind
wherever it is you are now

are you in the big city
i know you went north
before heading south

are you in-between
situation
or soul

do you look back
as often i do
to figure out the past

have you thought about love
has it found you at last
or have you avoided it

do you still cry
when you think about
that winter night at the park

the way the air smelt of smog
the old streetlights
reflecting off the snow

the summer morning
i came to see you
but you never showed

the bookstore
where i cursed you
before giving up

i’d like to ask
if you’re happy
if you’re safe

i’d like to be
in your circle
but you’re someone i can’t reach