at any rate

looking up from where i’ve fallen
figures obstruct my point of origin
my eyes are heavy from dissolution
after all of the effort i put in
to not be where i am now, anyways

rest assured i have a better plan
let it slide down from my hand
like a welcome letter you never got
from a dedicated soul like yourself
at least in appearnace, anyways

when i reach the bottom of this funk
i can bring you to the top again
once i get my bearings on escaping
this tricky tempermental quicksand
that pushes me farther under, anyways

can’t go past the point regardless
it truly can only be up from here
again where ever that might be
closer to you in anxiety ridden lies
then the leftover change i received, anyways

gifted my own hopes and dreams
for penny thoughts and diaries
of lunatics with mind rotting diseases
that they found the cure for in the twenties
but i can’t afford a lobotomy, anyways

transfer, or the difference in age

i get lost
from time to time
in the past

i feel my soul drift off
my body stays here
in the now
the air i breathe in
is from the present
but my eye gloss over
i see my memories

autumn evenings
just as dusk settles
i walk you home
we look over one another
but we hold back
as our stomachs ache
i walk to the corner alone

i close my eyes
open again

in the country
at a mansion
we sit on the fireplace
as others play games
on the balcony
overlooking overgrown green
as i confess my admiration
you laugh and run
up the spiral staircase
with a liqour bottle
leaving me with lipstick

i exhale
close my eyes again
open

the snow begins
you’ve been gone
looking into my eyes
you pull back
into your car
you drive around the corner

i blink

fifteen years
this corner hasn’t changed at all

i get lost
from time to time
in the past

but not on this corner
i know where i am here

enticing soul

we still talk about your beauty
even though we’ve moved on
the allure for you we had
was all for naught

your charming voice
that infectious smile
with an old soul and
blonde hair everywhere

at parties i stayed back
when you eagerly went on
to the next house or show
till the sun rose again

hometown weekends stopped
you went north, south
east, west – all over
your wandering soul

i hope to catch you
back in town
i’ll stay back still
just to admire

punk kids

driving from the lake
the only road to town
you turned at the light
i drove on by slowly
glancing over at you
to see your reflection
in the rear view mirror
see if you changed
since the last time
i saw you

i played drums
in your parents garage
you took up a guitar
best friend on bass
we made noise until
your father kicked us out
as the sun disappeared
you hugged me
with a cheek kiss
and a smile

that was fifteen years ago
your tattoos faded
but your eyes
still make me feel
younger then i was
blisters on my fingers
smile on our faces
no worries
till we depart again
in the dusk